A nightmare, I’d told Tamlin. I was the nightmare.
Feyre has returned to the Spring Court, determined to gather information on Tamlin’s maneuverings and the invading king threatening to bring Prythian to its knees. But to do so she must play a deadly game of deceit—and one slip may spell doom not only for Feyre, but for her world as well. As war bears down upon them all, Feyre must decide who to trust amongst the dazzling and lethal High Lords—and hunt for allies in unexpected places.
You can just tell by that long title that you’re in for something good *winks*
Does anyone remember the days when they used to have faith in SJM’s writing? No? We don’t either. Well, we do…we’re just loathe to admit it.
A Court of Wings and Ruin was one of our most anticipated reads of the year. We couldn’t wait to get our hands on it after finish ACOMAF because we were speechless when we finished that last line of that book. Our jaw was open and we just couldn’t comprehend the complete and utter brilliance of that ending.
So, we pre-ordered ACOWAR and waited impatiently for it to be delivered to our door. IT TOOK WEEKS FOR US TO GET IT. WEEKS!
And then we opened in and poof. We were catapulted into the highest levels of happiness for all of ten pages a la Team Rocket from the Pokemon cartoon. Life was great. We were great and then we thought how the hell did Feyre learn to manipulate Tamlin the Tool and what’s her name so quickly? They’re centuries older. This isn’t believable.
It’s all bloody lies!
This book is riddled with lies.
(Not the cute little white lies, oh no)
We started questioning everything like why does this book exist? Did Sarah hit her head while writing it? Did her editor hilariously drunk and say ‘Hey Bloomsbury, this is so good. Print it. Print it now before I take some aspirin.” We had a whole bunch of questions, but mostly we had wants.
- We wanted Nesta to be some badass Queen who had more power than all the High Lords and then we wanted her to rule. Give her a court and a crown and watch her win.
- We wanted Elain to have powers to. We wanted those powers to be deeply tied to the nightmare that was her experience in the Cauldron, but we wanted her to stay the gentle and and caring woman that she was…mostly.
- We wanted Amren to turn into some crazy dangerous dragon creature and eat Hybern’s head.
- We wanted Tamlin the Tool to die.
- We wanted Lucien to die.
- We wanted Cassian to have his wings still in tatters, too far gone to heal, but for him to find some way around this.
- We wanted Mor and Azriel to get together because hollah, someone give us a fan.
- We wanted the sixth mortal Queen to be wicked and wonderful and *sigh*
We didn’t get any of that. WE DIDN’T EVEN GET A DECENT WAR. WHAT!?
This is what we got:
- We got Nesta continuing to be standoffish and “powerful”, but her power turned out to be basically nothing. All the did was make some big explosion type thing and she didn’t even manage to kill Hybern with it. She almost had an emotional moment with Feyre, but that was cut short.
- She could track the Cauldron and that was so very boring.
- Elain became a Seer. Wooh. A walking fortune cookie.
- No one believed a thing she said and she went around talking to herself about this and that and ravens and stuff. She stopped eating and lost a scary amount of weight, but no one in the Night Court had a big freak out it.
- It’s only when Feyre becomes starved and suffers from malnutrition that anyone gives a damn.
- Amren became a chastised grandmother. How dare she speak so bluntly?
- She also got a boyfriend in the midst of ‘war’ and it was
swoon worthysickening. It was sickening.
- She didn’t even turn into a head eating dragon creature. We don’t know what she turned into? DOES ANYONE KNOW WHAT AMREN TURNED INTO?
- Cassian’s wings were just fined by the time Feyre arrived home. Dandy.
- Mor and Azriel didn’t get together. Instead Mor came out to Feyre and told her that she was bisexual. That she’d been hiding in for five hundred years because she was afraid (of what we don’t know) Prythian doesn’t seem to care who you’re sleeping with. It doesn’t care who you’re married to).
- But Mor would give Azriel hints every now and then to keep him interested.
- For five hundred years.
- She encouraged feelings that she didn’t return for five hundred years.
- She used him.
- It felt fake.
- You’d think after everything he’d been through as a child that she wouldn’t have used him in such a way, but no.
- The sixth mortal Queen turned out to be a phoenix thing?
- Her name is Fawkes. She’s gonna burn so bright for Dumbledore.
- AND LET’S NOT EVEN TALK ABOUT THE FACT THAT JULIAN IS SOME SORT OF GOOD GUY. YOU’RE NOT VICTOR VALE JULIAN. YOU. ARE. NOT.
- The ‘war’ had no proper casualties.
- And all the main characters’ friends turned up at just the right time.
Also, we summed up Feyre and Rhyand’s entire relationship.
Feyre: “I just suffered untold tragedies and I had to kill people. Do me”
Rhysand: “I just manipulated my way into emotional hell. Do me”
Feyre: “I haven’t seen my sisters in over a month. Thanks so much for letting me see them before you do me.”
Rhysand: “You’re so welcome. Do me”
You can tell how completely and utterly irritated and disappointed we were because we had expected Nesta to truly take something from the Cauldron. We wanted her to take power so much that we even made up our own little scene.
Soldiers were screaming all around her. They were screaming and they were dying and she just didn’t care. They were only people. They had hearts and minds and the pain in their eyes as swords ran them through or as horses trampled over them didn’t bother her because she coud feel it.
Her power rising to the surface. It wanted out.
She walked so slowly above the blood and the bodies, her hair blowing back until she was at the edge of the battlefield. Coming closer and closer was more of Hybern’s army. They were magnificent in their number and the power rolling off them…it was so pitiful to her.
“You will all…” said Nesta, her eyes bleeding black like the surface of the Cauldron “…fall.”
*insert applause here*
That’s the kind of Nesta were expecting and now having read ACOWAR, there are things that we genuinely think would have made everything better.
- The word mate to have never been used.
- Elain to have the power to remove shadows. So, like the opposite of a Shadowsinger, but it’d be more instinctual because she’d be scared of the darkness.
- Then she would bond with Azriel and learn to love the shadows/darkness and control her power until if she wanted, there would be no night.
- Azriel and Elain would obviously get together then.
- Mor to get with absolutely no one.
- Nesta to get with no one.
- Cassian to find himself a man.
- Or two.
- Rhys and Feyre to fade into the distance…one of them to die.
- Tamlin dead. LUCIEN DEAD. EVERYONE WE DON’T LIKE DEAD. ANYONE WHO WOULD REALISTICALLY DIE IN A GREAT BATTLE. DEAD.
- DEAD. DEAD. DEAD.
- Amren to turn into a vicious dragon creature made of light and might and then Amren to have the ability to switch forms because we love her.
- Nesta to get whichever court they had the meeting at.
- She seemed to like it there.
- More of Nuala and Cerridwen.
- They were neglected.
- Other stuff.
Thanks for reading!